Archive for September, 2008

One minute… to one week

Life can change in a minute.  A precious minute is all it takes to change the course of your life or the course of someone else’s life.  People do things that we don’t expect, say things we never thought we’d hear.  And all we can do is take it in and continue to breathe.

Who we are is not decided by the things people do to us and events that surround us, we can’t help that.  It’s how we handle those situations and who we become through out and after them.  After all, we’re not tested when things are good, that’s easy.  It’s when things get rough that truly defines your character.

Some have character, some don’t.  Some get what’s important in life and some don’t.  And those that do should absolutely not spend a single moment with those that don’t.

MATC

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33 weeks

Yesterdays doctors appointment went really well.  My weight hasn’t changed in 3 weeks but baby is growing right on schedule so everything is fine.  Although my doctor has asked for an ultra sound just to be sure I’m sure everything is fine.  I haven’t had much of an appetite these days so it’s probably my hips and thighs that are taking a break from expanding but the baby is ok.

33 weeks 178lbs

33 weeks 178lbs

So far the grand sub total of weight gain is approx 36 lbs which is about an average of 1.5 lbs per week which I’m comfortable with.  If I maintain that for the next 7 weeks my total weight gain will be under 50lbs which I can live with.  Better than 80!!

For some reason I just can’t be one of those preggo women who are belly only.  They’re amazing those women, I have to say.  From the back you would never say they are pregnant.  It’s like they shoved a basketball under their shirt.  I see them in my doctors office and want to ask them are you really pregnant or just here to make me feel like shit? Ha ha.

33 weeks with 36 extra pounds

33 weeks with 36 extra pounds

MATC

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The Real Heroes

What it means to be a single Mom

You and your kids have you to count on fully and completely only.

You have no one to rely on but yourself. No one is obligated to help you and even if they are it doesn’t mean they will.

No one is walking through the door to help you, to see you or to say I’ll take it from here you get some rest.

You are not a team. You are on your own.

It’s up to you and only you to protect your children from everyone and everything.

Just because you spent all day with them doesn’t mean you get a break. You have to spend all night with them too.

You become both of their parents. You are their Mom and Dad

Your heart grows bigger because you now have to care for them and protect them twice as much.

Your fears grow bigger because the responsibility can be overwhelming.

Your determination to give them a better life, to make up for their loss, that wasn’t their fault but unfortunately will be the ones to pay.

Who is the hero?  The person that cuts the cheque every month or the one who is there to put them to bed at night, no matter how long it takes and be there in the morning when they wake up no matter how tired or how little sleep you’ve got.

Moms are the heroes in this world, especially single Moms.

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Wrapping up Summer

It’s so sad to see the summer come to an end, especially since it feels like it went by so fast.  This will probably be one of our last weekends up at Sauble Beach for the season.  Looking back at last summer and this summer it’s amazing how things change and we don’t even see it.  Summers blend into one another, children grow, we age, time goes on.

M used to sleep the whole 3 hour drive up to the cottage.  Then she would sleep for half and look out the window for half.  Now she watches Dora or Leapfrog on the DVD player, watches out the window and points out all the cows along the way.  When did this baby become a singing talking person??

Soon there will be 2 babies in the back seat as I look through the rear view mirror heading up to the cottage.  M will tell her brother where we are going and what we’re going to do when we get there, like I do for her.  She’ll be the pro, the expert.

MATC

Summer 2008

Summer 2008

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Riverdale Farm

What a fun day!  M and I went to the Riverdale Farm in Cabbagetown and it was much better than I expected it to be.  I thought it was a little farm with one or two barns and a few chickens but I was so pleasantly surprised!

First we saw the chickens and piggies, M knew them all by name and the sounds they make.  Then we went over to the horses (my favourite) and the sheep.  Again, she knew what each animal was and their sounds.  I was so impressed!  I thought she’d be scared of the animals but she came right up to them.

After the animals we went on the discovery walk which I didn’t even know existed there.  It was so nice, the forest and the trees, the ponds.

Great day!

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31 weeks

9 weeks to go.  Todays weigh in at the doctors was comforting in a way – no gain and no loss.  I stayed exactly the same.  The doctor measured and listened and did all the routine stuff and said everything was normal so that means that the baby is growing but I’m not.  At least this week.  Yay!  I’m still ahead compared to may last pregnancy.

31 weeks 178 lbs

31 weeks 178 lbs

My good friend from Holland emailed me a pic of herself at 38 weeks on a beach… in a bikini!!!  Bitch!  I’ve put on a bathing suit this summer (one piece of course) but no way would a camera be allowed to point in my direction while I’m in it.

I have to say that a lot of my weight is in my boobs.  That seems to be where weight likes to go on me.  Last time they came down but only after like a year.  I have nice bras that I’d like to wear again someday so hopefully it won’t take too long.

Till next time!

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Work Widow

This is a debate that goes on and on in many families and even Michelle Obama confessed it was a big problem in her marriage early on.  What I’m talking about is being home alone with the kids with no husband in sight.  The logical part of me knows that Hubby is working to provide for us and most times I’m really grateful that he works so hard so I don’t have to.  I get to be with M all the time and work when I want.  Which is great.

But the other part of me, which doesn’t surface often thankfully, is a bit resentful that he’s never home and I do it all by myself.  I’m not even talking about doing the dutiful tasks like helping out around the house I’m talking about spending leisure time with us.

So far this week we’ve spent 1 night all together as a family.  The rest of the nights either he is working or I’m out.  I know its nothing that can be helped and I don’t want to be one of those wives that complain that their husband works too much  yet also wants nice things and doesn’t want to work.  I know I can’t have it both ways but sometimes it just sucks.

Anyway, M and I are going to the Riverdale Farm today so that should be fun.

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Spears vs Palin

When I first heard that Jamie Lynn Spears was pregnant the first thing I thought is ‘what is that Mom doing?’ and after all the media scrutiny and judgement of Lynne Spears as the worst mother on earth I figured it was true and I was right.  Bad mother didn’t do her job.

Then came Palin.  Outspoken and confident comparing herself to a pitbull so that the men take her seriously yet still calling herself a soccer mom so that women and moms can relate to her.  Please.  What is motherly about a woman with a pregnant 17 year old daughter and a 4 month old baby with down syndrome going into the work force full time plus.

Why is it that when Jamie Lynn got pregnant we were shocked and blamed her mom yet when Palin’s daughter is in the same situation we’re ready to pass it off as something that happens… to a republican???  Who is supposed to advocate family values??!!

Palin going to work as vice president is of course impressive and the fact that Hillary Clinton fought for so many years and worked so hard to get to a presidential election and raised a daughter who didn’t have a baby by 18, yet Palin coming in out of nowhere ready to leave behind a family that clearly needs her to serve her country is ludicrous to me.

If I worked full time and found out that my teenage daughter is pregnant that would be enough for me to realize I’m not spending enough time being a Mom to my kids and leave my job.  Add to that a 4 month old with special needs and I’d probably not see the light of day for the unforseen future, and neither would my pregnant teenage daughter.

But Palin finds this a good time to turn up her career.  What does that say?  What type of example is that?

Nancy Pelosi began her political career when she was in her 60’s after raising 5 kids and seeing the youngest one off to college at 21.  That’s admirable.  In my opinion what Palin is doing is not admirable.  In fact it’s selfish and greedy.  No one says that we can’t have it all but I don’t think we can have it all AT ONCE and not see some consequences and fall out.

And now after Lynn Spears book has come out and I’ve read some excerpts of it I have to say that I’ve changed my mind about her.  I no longer condemn her, instead to some degree I feel sorry for her and hope that I have better influence and control over my children.  What happened to her happens to millions of Mom’s every day all over the world.  She has 3 kids and 2 of them famous with influences and temptations that most of us will never know.  I hope that my kids aren’t tempted by drugs, and that’s only amongst the peer pressure of their friends in school.  How hard must it be for her to watch the world tempt her daughters.  Fame and fortune and wealth can be very overwhelming for anyone but for a 17 year old it’s almost a given.

Now, of course I can run a list of things she could have/should have done to prevent her daughter getting pregnant but there are no gaurantees are there?  You do your best and hope its enough.  Parents of kids who commit crimes and murders I’m sure don’t feel the need to tell their kids every day that murder is bad and wrong – they just expect them to know.  Yet the kids do it anyway.

If Palin is elected I don’t think it sends a good message.  We’ve come far to be able to work when we want to but do we really need to sacrifice our children’s welfare for it.  Even the job of vice president.  I thought motherhood was the most important job in the world.  Even if we sometimes make mistakes.

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All talk and no action

Ok, here’s the deal, I don’t feel like doing anything.  At all.  Every day I make a list in my head of all the things I have to do and each day as I’m driving home from work or from the cottage I think about how I’m going to do these things as soon as I get home but something happens between the time I walk into the house and actually doing these things.  Well actually it’s more correct to say nothing happens – I don’t do anything.  And I know I should.  I have a website to work on and a product that I’m trying create amongst other things but nothing is as appealing as sitting on the couch and reading with M or doing Diego and Dora puzzles.   Even cooking is a chore these days.  Hubby leaves for Denver tomorrow until Monday (wow, thats long) and as much as I like it when he’s home and we’ll miss him I won’t feel the pressure to cook which is soooooooooooooo nice.

I mustered enough strength to do laundry today since he’s leaving at 5 in the morning and needs some clean clothes but now I’m pooped.  Just after 2 loads of laundry!

I hope the remaining 2 1/2 months aren’t like this or I’m in trouble.  Maybe it’s the weather, whatever it is I hope it passes soon.  Ok, I have to go put the laundry in the dryer… and then fall asleep.

Completely unrelated here are a few pics of the Sauble sunsets that I took over the weekend.

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